Furry.
I should really be running errands and doing my homework, but unfortunately tumblr is calling to me to reflect. My recent posts haven’t been very deep, so I guess it’s a good thing I took off work today to get all my things done. And heal my tired body, of course. I’ve been more busy than usual, but I think a main reason I haven’t posted much is really because I’m not sure how to put my recent thoughts into words. As often as I am open, these past weeks have been rough for me emotionally and sharing my relationship with the rest of the world, just doesn’t seem too right.
I sent my jeans to the tailor for hemming, my varsity to the cleaners (eco-friendly of course), and got to run to the gym, and then off to practice. I’d say it was a pretty good day, except for the fact I missed out on money for work.
Then again, what is the point of money if it can’t bring me happiness? Despite being able to have a solid job, I find myself slowly falling into a slump - like feelings of pointlessness and mediocrity are overwhelming my mind more and more each day. After only seven months at what I consider my first job, I find myself repeating, “I love my job. I love my job. I love my job.” Denial, much? And here I thought only adults and old people were miserable. I feel as if as generations get younger, they also get unhappier earlier. I mean, the new standard is going to be a Master’s degree! If people of the world spend their existences learning in schools, when do they actually live?
When do we actually start to live?
I am someone who lives to learn, but this “slump” of mine is opening my eyes to reality. I may enjoy learning new things, but school is not going to help me live my own life. Make something of my own existence. So recently, I have been questioning just who I am, what I am doing, and if any of it is worth doing. If any of it is worth living for.
I never feel like I’m doing enough.
